Saturday, December 26, 2009

Today I went to visit my father's (also grandmother and uncles) grave. I did this for the first time on Halloween when I was here in PA, but didn't take any pictures. As you can see, my dad died in February so a graveside service was not held. I wanted to come back and document it and to try to remember how I felt that day upon seeing it for the first time.

A little backstory: my mom and dad divorced when I was quite young. When my mom remarried and moved to NY I saw my dad several times a year. I did not know him very well. I've pieced together some glimpses of him from the time that I spent with him (which was always fun) and from what others have told me.

It's so weird to see this grave and to know this is my father and to feel somewhat detached. I didn't even know he was a Sergeant in the Air Force. I knew he was in the A.F. but had little knowledge of anything else. I wonder a lot about him. I wonder which parts of me I got from him. I don't particularly look like him, though my brother does. He was always pretty quiet, so I know I didn't inherit that either. I have so little to go on, so I just assume I'm my mother's child. I think I'm ok with that.

I do have a lot of fond memories. I inherited my first car from him. A 1987 Chevy Cavalier. Tons of great memories of helping him wash and wax the car, playing air guitar and drums to the oldies with my brother in the backseat, minigolfing, him laughing at me minigolfing because I'd get pissed when I lost, him watching my brother and I play hockey in the driveway, taking us to hockey and baseball games. Some very good times. When I think of these times, I feel as though he was a very good man, if even he had some very rough patches.

I decide to focus on these precious few memories even though I know some hard things about my dad. I'm writing it down so the precious few don't escape me later on. I know that I loved him in a way that a child has that sort of blind love and loyalty for her parents.

I realize this post is a little disjointed and doesn't flow well. I'm not going to edit it. These are just the way the thoughts flowed. It's a good start to sorting through all this stuff. I have some work to do, yet, but a decent start for sure.

Tuesday, December 08, 2009

Christmas Fairies

When we got our Christmas tree last week I told the girls that there were Christmas fairies that lived in the branches of the tree that bring snow and do other various jobs to get ready for Christmas. Kiddo thought she should leave a note for the fairies. The following is what she wrote (urtext):

Hi! Dear Christmas Fairies,
I Have 3, mabey 4 questions for you.
#1. Could you tell Nissa I'm better at spelling?
#2. What are your leaders, (kings or queens) Names?
#3. Do you actaully not make noise?
#4. Has anybody in the world seen you or Discovered you?
#5. Can you get sick?
#6. Are any kinds of germs bigger then you?

that's all. I hope you can answer my questions! I love you, whoever you are! (Look on the back for further reading.)

Hey fairies, Do you know Santa, If you know him so much He's your leader, do NOT answer the second question! P.S. When answering my questions, Put numbes next to them so I know what you're talking about!


I answered #2 by saying that technically Santa is the top dog but because there are millions of Christmas fairies worldwide, they organize by region. Our particular fairies come from Western NY League of Christmas Fairies, Local 79. They do have a League head whose name is Eolyn.
I also replied that Nissa (who is the tooth fairy working our circuit) was impressed by Kiddo's efforts in spelling and to keep up the good work so she can get a good job someday.

Good times, good times.