Headlines

These headlines are totally why I keep Yahoo! around. 

"California aquarium blames flooding on curious octopus"

"Illinois mystery: Placentas found in sewage system"

"Odd News Video: Big ape learns how to whistle"

"Cypriots and U.N. soldiers in asparagus standoff"

Twilight

I just finished reading the book "Twilight", which had been passed along for me to read by my mother-in-law.  Though dubious, you can't not read books passed along from your mother-in-law.  It took me about 8 hours to read and only about a half hour to understand why this book is such a success.

Theory number 1.  

Secretly, every woman is in love with love.  Meaning she wants to be the subject of some dude's rock song, to receive handwritten letters or a bouquet of origami lilies, and generally to be swept off her feet in a movie worthy flourish (sorry, Chuck Klosterman...you were right. Stupid John Cusack and his dumb radio).  

I won't lie.  I am no exception to this theory.  I am also attracted to shiny things and impulsively buy boxes of fortune cookies from the endcaps at the grocery store.  Get over it, people.  I'm female. Sheesh.  

Anyway, "Twilight" satisfies theory number one.  The achingly gorgeous male lead, who also happens to be a vampire, is constantly dazzling the female lead, who is the self-described ordinary girl who is hopelessly and endearingly clumsy but is seen as totally hot by all high school boys and can't help but get asked to the prom by every boy.  

Theory number 2.

Everyone gets caught up in the classic story of two people who love each other but can't be together for whatever reason.  In this case, it just happens to be that the achingly gorgeous lead just can't help being what he is and that means they can never be in love because he might accidentally suck all of her blood, thus making her a vampire. Isn't that ultimately a good thing?  Then they can spend eternity together making vampire babies.  If you said 'yes' you'd be wrong. Achingly gorgeous vampire finds blushing to be the one quality that he loves most about self-described ordinary, yet hopelessly and endearingly clumsy human female.  Vampire ladies don't blush.  OMG. How romantic.

Again, "Twilight" delivers.  And again, who doesn't like the Romeo and Juliet-esque tragedy?  

There you have it.  Due to the Harlequin romance novel nature of this book, I apologize that I may be slightly less smart for a few days. Sorry.  Also, see Tyler for those lilies.      

Blergh

As part of getting my hygiene degree we had to take a class on recognizing child abuse because we are mandated to report it if we see or suspect it.  The images we saw in that class were so awful and made me so angry.  I never expected to have to make such a report until I had to do it today-for a 4 year old patient.  There aren't words to express the anger and sense of injustice I feel.  

That said, I can only pray that this child would be removed from this situation.  I hope you will too.

Crooked

Water flows across the breast in frantic lines,

like a hungry snake whose meal escaped its fate.

I am the hunted vermin who found solace in the crooked vines,

and your crooked smile brings a peace when the hour is late.

The blackened sod beneath me writhes and yearns,

like a half-born child whose lungs have yet to taste the air.

I am the suffocated who found breath in a steady breeze,

and your steady hand brings warmth to a soul stripped bare.

(c) Mel Muscarella 01/09    (so don't steal my stuff, k?)

*No chorus and I haven't yet rhymed either "yearns" or "breeze" though I'm leaning on keeping "breeze".

Really?

Four friends of mine, Scott and Tracey Austin(whose links are to your right) and Brian and Bec Haak ran a marathon a little over a year ago.  I thought they were crazy, because really-who wants to run some 26 miles in a row?  But I thought that it was pretty cool to set up a goal like that and then accomplish it. I was so impressed by their accomplishment and even thought I'd give some thought to a half marathon if they decided to ever do something like that again.

It looks like they've decided to do something like that again...only this time it's a triathlon instead.  So I think I'm going to seriously look into doing a triathlon. I've been looking for some motivation to get back into shape and I think this would be sufficient motivation.  

I'm going to do a little research to see what such an endeavor would physically, monitarily and emotionally entail, but in the meantime I'm going to start working to get myself to a place where I'm physically capable of beginning the training.

I'm interested to see where this goes.  I'm not always reliable when it comes to long distance type things, in that I don't always finish what I start.  I've got a dumb puzzle in my basement that's been 3/4 done for over a year now...I'd really like to impress myself by setting a sizeable goal and then meeting it.

Wish me luck!

"Hear that? We're using CODE Names!!!!"

I will fully and readily admit that I don't know much about the Secret Service...though I think that's the point, isn't it?  Is it just me, or does this not make any sense?  Wouldn't they want to keep this information on the down low?

Seriously?  I already can't stand SUVs and this new tricked out Hummer isn't helping to change my mind.  Maybe it's so the rich, white suburban husbands can feel like their wives are safe while driving through the ghetto?  

But, you have to give it to Hummer...the new concept works kind of like a Transformer.  The best part is how you can take off the fender flares for additional clearance on those off road trails.

Right.  For all those housewives going off road. 

So Tasty...

Guys, I know that Hershey's is not the most best chocolate in the world.  Yes, I said most best. Get over it.  However, Hershey's chocolate is hands down my favorite.  Now I enjoy just about any Hershey's chocolate product, but there is really something to opening a plain old chocolate bar and appreciating the cool, smooth, flawlessness of the bar itself.  

Appreciating the bar itself is only part of the Hershey's experience.  Eating the bar is, obviously, the best part.  As Moira Kelly says in that really bad skating movie of the early nineties, the experience is "almost orgasmic".  Yes, I said orgasmic.  Get over it. 

Anyway, you get my drift.  And as for that bad skating movie, I say it's bad but I will probably watch it anyway if it's on.  It's got DB Sweeney and Dabney Coleman in it for God's sake! Geez. Then they do that whole Pamchenko Twist thing at the end.  

Now you know what to get me for my birthday.  A set of these, though, is always ok too.    

Mel, Circa...

                                                  1968

                                    I look like my mom!!!

                                                     1978

                       What do you think, guys?  Yes?  Me too.

                                                1992

               Not too far off from what I looked like in 8th grade...

Fun times, guys.  I did learn, however, that I'd never make it as a blonde.  These, along with 1974, 1980 and 1990 will be up on facebook.    

Her?

Of all the people that should be immortalized as a solid gold statue...

On The Fall

"God does not choose to tell us why He let Satan walk around in the Garden so he could talk to Adam and Eve, and He doesn't tell us why God did not talk to Adam and Eve to kindly counsel them about Satan's deception...And while God told the sad couple in no uncertain terms to not eat from the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil, He did not seem to tell them that there was such a thing as a  lie, and such a being as a liar."               -Don Miller 

I find this a curious statement.  It kind of changes the way I see the Fall and humanity's frailness and vulnerability to sin.  It also brings into question God's knowledge of the Fall, his allowance of it, and what greater purpose it may have served if He knew about it and let it happen.  Which, of course, also brings into question free will.  

So.  From my understanding, Lucifer is an angel who gets the boot from heaven because he wants to be God.  To be honest, I'm not entirely sure where this idea comes from.  I wiki'd Lucifer and found a bunch of different ideas.  Either way, Lucifer gets sentenced to earth.  I imagine Lucifer/Satan is probably bitter about the whole thing and wanders about his prison looking for something to destroy because he's so mad.  He happens upon Adam and Eve and successfully convinces them that they can be like God-the same thing he got the boot out of heaven for.  

Adam and Eve, meanwhile, have only ever been in relationship with God and whatever other animals they were surrounded by.  They have never been confronted with evil and at first contact, fail miserably.  Can they be at fault for this?  Of course, they had God's "law" set for them-don't eat from this tree-but did God realize at the point of their failure that His law was not enough?  Did God know when he made them that they would be inherently incapable of keeping His one command?  

I guess I had always thought that God hatched the Jesus plan after the Fall-as a result of it. But what if that was the plan all along, before he ever made Adam and Eve, knowing that He would create vulnerable people that would need Him.   Certainly makes current struggles easier to understand.  

I realize I've made several assumptions, here.  I kind of let thoughts roll to see what came out...feel free, as always, to leave comment. 

  

Saved by the Bell Quote of the Day

Thank God for Dinosaur Comics who pointed me in the direction of this little gem of a blog.  I just spent roughly an hour reading through the archives.  Hilarious stuff.  Well done, Steve Carey!  

Identity

In furthering a thought I had a few days ago on what it means to be a Christian, I have been pondering the more specific idea of identity. Not just identity in Christ, just identity in general.

We all have roles that we fill.  Some are inherent roles-son, daughter, brother, sister, etc. Others are roles that are chosen-mother, friend, musician, teacher, husband, etc.  We use these roles to describe ourselves to others in "about me" sections of internet profiles or to a person you might like to date or just befriend.  But those roles, while formational, don't make an identity, do they?

This idea is one I find myself at odds with.  This inner skirmish tends to sometimes produce thoughts like my previous post, where I find myself sort of emotionally numb.  I certainly have many roles that I fill.  Outside of them, though, I don't know my own identity.  

Often, it's easy to look to others to tell me who I am.  I find validation and approval and thus value in others views of me.  When I feel I don't have the approval of others it puts me in a funk and I get to feeling worthless-though not in the dramatic way that the term sounds...just that it makes me question worth, which then leads to identity.

When I strip away the roles and other's opinions, I find it scary to look at what is left.  This is more a thought exercise than something that can actually be done, as it's sort of a romantic notion to be able actually strip ones self of all their roles.  But once you begin to conceive of yourself in this way, you get to looking at the kind of person you are as opposed to what you do.

 

 

    

  

Dissociation

I came across Romans 10 today as part of this week's common Lectionary readings.  I read through the whole chapter but verses 9 and 10 really stuck out.  I read it a few times and then it kind went on a bit of a rabbit trail from there.  

Here's the rabbit trail.  What does it mean to "believe something in your heart"?  Are you supposed to have some sort of feeling associated with that particular belief in order to authenticate the belief?  

Here's a for instance.  At Artisan we often use a creed as a confession of what we believe.  I would say that at a very base level, I believe those things that you find in a creed.  But I don't necessarily feel any connection to it (my beliefs) beyond a sort of academic level, or I just notice that I feel kind of dissociated.    

Likewise, I feel sort of dissociated from much of life these days. Almost, but not quite, fully numb.  Not quite because I do still feel anger very well.  But other than feeling anger, I feel separate from everything else.  This is not for lack of things around me that I could feel good about.  It's more that I am kind of an observer to those things rather than a participant in them.

     

  

Hitting the Pool

I decided that I need to get into shape.  I've lost about 15 pounds-back to where I was before I had Emily.  While that's great, I get tired just going upstairs to the girls room.  I googled my old swim team coach which promptly displayed a website with his address and phone number. Hope no one bad is looking for him:)  

Anyway, I called him up and had to leave a message and didn't expect that he'd actually call back, but he did!  He had no idea who I was even though I left my maiden name on his machine. He remembers my brother, though, who may or may not have had him as a math teacher.

Either way, he gave me some pointers and a loose pool workout to get started on and he'll be sending me some dryland workouts, hopefully including the medicine ball regimen we used to do.

Now I'm sure that any people who happen upon this blog, regularly or otherwise, could care less about the fact that I need to get in shape.  I only post this here in hopes that since I wrote about it, I have to do it.  Plus, I just got a card giving me free access to MCC's pool for a year.

So now I have to go whip myself into shape.  Or, as Devo would put it, I must whip it! 

Here's something I've been thinking on for a little.  What does it mean to be a Christian?  I've done an excellent job at naming things that I strongly dislike about Christianity and, therefore, Christians as well. Christianity doesn't necessarily imply Christians, but do you have Christianity without them?  

The term 'Christian' carries both positive and negative connotations.  If I were to tell someone that I am a Christian, it will bring up an image in that person's mind (whether positive, negative or indifferent) about what they think of Christians/Christianity.  That person has little choice but to ascribe those thoughts and feelings to me.  

So is there anything that is completely objective about being a Christian?  

To kind of define the word itself, I take the term to mean that a 'christian' is someone who associates or identifies him/herself with Christ.  Identifies as in to find an identity in Christ. Much like an American lives in America, makes America his/her home, has a citizenship, supports American ideals, and is surrounded by other Americans, a Christian identifies with Christ in this way.  (S)He lives in Christ, boasts a citizenship, supports Christ-like ideals, is surrounded by other Christians, etc...

Can it really be that simple?  What if it were?  What if everything I did was based simply on this definition?  

The image of Christians has become so perverted that it takes some thought to really figure out what, exactly, it means to label oneself as such.  Once you strip away connotations (which may not be entirely possible), you're left with a definition that, I think, begs you to do something with.  If I indeed am those things, then what? I can't ignore it.  I am compelled to move, if only even to simply try to figure out what the definition means in a practical way.

  

Come on, feminists... you have to admit this is kinda funny.   

Granny Call

Harriet Kenyon Call

I was thinking about my grandmother this morning. She was a pretty awesome lady who did some kick ass things in her lifetime, the most notable (from what I know) being that she was a WASP.

My dad has shared some pretty crazy stories about his mom who was an excellent cook, painter and pianist as well as a freaking pilot in World War II. From his stories and from my own memories of her I get an excellent picture of a woman who loved fiercely and who lived life for all it was worth.

Hers is a legacy I hope to live up to.

Stop Consuming

I came across this website because I saw it on a shirt on one of the members at Artisan and briefly overheard that member describing it to someone who had asked about it.

Stopconsuming.org seems, at first glance, to be part of a movement to raise awareness about the growing culture of consumerism in American churches and American Christians.  This idea, of course, is something that has been bugging me lately.   

Anyway, I think that the Shema movement (which is the movement associated with the website) wants to encourage people (Christians) to get out of a consumers mindset and go do something-no matter what that something is-for the sake of Christ.  

I'm not going to jump into any movement for the sake of being in a movement.  I'm not that kind of activist.  I'm not any kind of activist, really.  Rather, I think I am one of those consumers. This could account for my disgruntled-ness as what bothers me about others is the same thing that bothers me about myself.  I'm not doing anything. I sit at church and compare bands and judge sermons and then leave relatively unchanged.  

I wonder if I've become fat with Jesus or overfilled. A glass that has been overfilled with water spills over and creates a mess. Indeed, water is necessary.  But too much water is destructive.  I wonder if this is my problem.  I'm overfilled and instead of doing something with all the excess, it has become destructive.  I am cynical, overly critical, angry, arrogant and lazy.  

So now I just need to figure out what to physically do.  I don't know if being angry at "x-brand Christianity" means I should do something about x-brand Christianity or if I'm mad at x-brand because I am x-brand to some extent.  In that case I should do something about being x-brand. Maybe it is a little of both.  I guess I'll let you know when I find out.

As always, feel free to leave comments, especially if you know a little something more about this Shema thing.         

   

Countertops a Cancer Risk?

Really!  

To be fair, I didn't actually read the article, but the headline from Yahoo! News made me laugh a little.  Plus the headline is enough to spread sensationalist rumors.  Who needs to read the article?!

Next week:  "Licking granite countertops has been shown to cure cancer!"

Turns out you can't breathe near the countertop-that causes cancer.  But licking the countertop while holding your breath will cure that same cancer.